I have been staring at my computer screen for some time now
trying to figure out where to start, how much information
is too much information?
I would love to share a bit of Christmas decorating or tales of our
last trip to the cabin but it feels wrong to just dive right back in
without at least sharing a bit of what's been happening in my
little corner of the world. If you would rather not hear about the
everyday insanity that seems to have enveloped me of late
then feel free to skip over this post.
As many of you know my sister was diagnosed with lung cancer
a year ago. This summer it spread to her brain, requiring quite a bit
of radiation to her head. We were told by the radiologist and
oncologist that after some time her brain function would return
to some normalcy. I've decided that most of these doctors are
'pollyannas' and would rather just keep the conversation light rather
than discuss the hard truth when dealing with a potentially fatal disease.
I guess they figure by the time you get around to demanding some
real answers, it'll all be too late for questions anyway.
As my sister's day to day functioning has gotten worse I finally decided
we needed to see a neurologist. I was getting pretty tired of the pat answer
'she's doing fine' when I would bring up concerns about her behavior
and mental state. God bless that neurologist, he finally gave us the truth.
Her brain function will never return to 'normal', she will continue to have
problems with many tasks and should no longer be driving. Why was that so
hard for any of these other doctors to say?
It's been a bit overwhelming but I have taken over doing her banking, paying
her bills and filling her daily pill boxes so she doesn't take the wrong
meds or forget altogether. Getting her to an appoitment still requires a
morning phone call and showing up early to make sure she's dressed.
She forgets from the time I call until I pick her up what she was supposed to do.
It's all very sad really, mostly because she feels bad that she can't and
doesn't remember. I have to keep reminding myself that given enough time
she'll forget that too.
I am grateful for all the time I am spending with her as I am aware that these days
will be over all too soon. When? Only God can say, it may be weeks, months
or even a year or longer. It will be too soon whenever He calls her home.
Please keep her in your prayers!