I was fairly certain back then at the ripe old age of 22 that I was prepared and could handle it, after all I watched my Mom make it seem like a walk in the park, right? No one prepares you for the fact that you will love these children more than you ever thought it humanly possible to love anyone. You are not prepared for a love so large that it is like having your 'heart beating outside of your own body'. Your joy, pain, accomplishements, growth, setbacks are so intricately intertwined with theirs that it's impossible to feel the difference between their emotions and yours. When they hurt you hurt, when they rejoice you rejoice.
Despite the fabrics of your lives being so interwoven they grow up and you must let them. The fabric and seams must start to unravel a bit and you have to let them build their own tapestry. It is not always easy to let the strings unravel and to become part of another. While there are always common threads you must be careful to loosen your grip lest you pull too tightly and risk strangling them.
So today I celebrate the bright sunshine that is and always has been my firstborn, Joshua.
Now for all you new Moms out there, remember that it is normal to live through the 'terrible twos', the angst of adolescence, and the trials of young adulthood. You will both survive and you will be blessed as I have been with this wonderful adult who shares this wonderful connection called family. Josh is a wonderful man and I am so very proud of him but rest assured he will always be my baby!